


Reflection

by TheDrawingBoard



Series: His Own Answers [2]
Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Canon Divergent, Double Ed, M/M, that feeling when your hallucination has more balls than you
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-16
Updated: 2017-05-16
Packaged: 2018-11-01 10:06:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10919616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDrawingBoard/pseuds/TheDrawingBoard
Summary: "I feel your every move. I know your every thought. I’m with you from birth, and I’ll see you rot. What am I?"After waking up in an unknown warehouse near the docks, Ed knows he's in more trouble than a headache the crowbar gave him. Never is that as clear as it is when he is confronted by none other than his own double self. However, this drug induced projection of his stronger self makes him face more than just his situation: his true feelings for Oswald Cobblepot.





	Reflection

**Author's Note:**

> I started writing this series of one shots after watching 3x15. However, now that 3x18 has come and gone, I'm starting to notice just how canon divergent this has become.
> 
> No matter! I will see this through to the end! This was really enjoyable for me to write, so please enjoy part 2 out of 3 of His Own Answers.

When Ed awoke, it was like his head was swimming. His vision couldn’t focus. His heartbeat pounding against his ears and all through his head, overwhelming his senses. There was a soft ringing from the side he was hit on- right! He was hit. With a crowbar. As his mind began to sharpen, the first thing to hit him was the irony of the situation. When all humor had left him, however, he was forced to take in his predicament from what he could see, what he could figure out. Unfocused and uncooperative vision scanning his surroundings, the injured man came to the conclusion that he wasn’t at the mansion anymore. He was in some sort of warehouse- a boat horn cut through the ringing and pounding, giving him something else to focus on. Near the docks. The warehouse was near the docks. Looking from one side of his body to the other, he noted the lack of mobility in his arms and legs. They were strapped down, restraints on each limb, giving him faint Arkham flashbacks. It was like strapping down a patient “for their own good”. The cot holding him up was an old medical cot from what he could piece together. His head hurt. Returning to his scavenger hunt for survival, Ed could finally see some of the cracks in the walls as his vision began to return to him. As his gaze passed over the doorway, his vision finally spotted something it could focus on.

A man.

As the blurriness passed and the ringing fell silent, his eyes began to focus on whoever was standing in the room with him. The man’s image grew sharper and sharper. He was wearing… green. A very familiar green suit. Once his gaze reached his face, Ed realized he was locking eyes with himself. With-

“ _ The Riddler, _ ” the two said in unison, Ed staring in wonder at the presence of the other, continuing to speak without him, “Why are you here?”

The recently-named double version of himself rolled his neck to stretch it out, taking a deep breath before looking right at the other, hazel eyes piercing him with such an intense gaze- despite the humor in his voice.  _ I’m just using this opportunity to thank you, Ed. It’s been awful having no name to go off of except for your “double,”  _ his voice echoed Ed’s thoughts, causing a stereo effect within his mind,  _ But I have say: this is pathetic. Taking drugs again- two at a time, no less? And letting the thoughtless trio of try-hards track you down this easily. _ Clicking his tongue, the Riddler shook his head in disappointment, taking a few steps towards Ed, the word _ pathetic  _ echoing against the walls of his mind.

He began to struggle against the restraints, suddenly desperate to try and get away from him. There was always something about him that scared him despite the fact that he knew he was just a projection from his own mind. Something so real about him had an eerie effect on Ed.

_ Maybe it’s because I’m you?  _ he answered his thoughts unenthusiastically. Leaning against the cot with his back to Ed, the Riddler let out a sigh as he crossed his arms over his chest,  _ Or, to put it in your words, I am the stronger and smarter version of you- the version of you people would fear. However, it seems as though you never considered that maybe you might be scared yourself of- _

“Shut up,” Ed shot in quickly, trying interrupt that line of thinking before it became dangerous, “Stop telling me things I already know. Just… Why are you here? Really? You never show up without a reason,” the Riddler’s head slowly tilted slightly as he listened, however his otherwise unchanging demeanor made Ed’s throat tighten with nerves, “a-and I know just saying thank you isn’t enough for you. I know you-”

_ Us. _

“Me. I know me. I would never call for you unless I needed it.”

The Riddler chuckled softly, looking over his shoulder at his helpless host. The smirk plastered on his face was almost evil, almost taunting Ed, yet his eyes were full of pity.  _ Edward,  _ he let the syllables of the name roll off his tongue playfully,  _ we’ve had a nice few weeks, haven’t we? _

At first, Ed thought the answer was rhetorical, but when the other continued to look at him and raise his eyebrows expectantly, he knew he had to say something. “Y-Yes?” he questioned at first, unable to look himself in the eye, but then cleared his throat and looked directly at the other, “Yes. Yes, it has been… interesting to say the least. Very… liberating.” The answer seemed to please the projection, causing him to chuckle softly. Then he shook his head slightly, as if it was expected. Of course it was expected, Ed had to remind himself. He was still a part of his mind after all.

_ However you want to describe it,  _ he swung his arms open slightly, as if to show he didn’t really care. After a moment of silence, frozen in place, he spun on his heel and slammed down hard on the edge of the cot- enough to make Ed wonder if the reason the cot shook in that moment was from his own fear or the pure force of his imagination. Probably a bit of both.  _ However you want to describe it,  _ he began again, voice growling in anger,  _ you ruined it! You  _ ruined  _ what we had- what we worked for!  _ Throwing his hands up in bewilderment, the Riddler stared Ed down as he slowly returned his arms back to his sides, letting the word  _ ruined  _ bounce around in Ed’s mind as if it was bouncing around the room.

“I didn’t ruin it!” he protested, sitting up to get in his face as much as he could to stand his ground against his subconscious, “I knew I was going to be tracked down! I knew Barbara, Butch, and Tabitha would try and take me out of the picture once they realized I wasn't going along with their agenda! I knew these things would happen eventually, but I was always one step ahead of them-”

_ You call  _ this _ one step ahead of them?! _

“That’s not the point!” Ed watched the Riddler take a few steps back and rub his eyes under his glasses in controlled rage- the mirror image of how he does it, “I’m still alive! They didn’t catch me! If they caught me, I would be dead, wouldn’t I?!”

That’s _ not the point!  _ The other shot back so quick that the moment Ed blinked, he was greeted with the projection right in his face once again.  _ No,  _ he continued with almost labored breath,  _ No, the point is that you  _ had  _ to go back to the one place you knew could unravel you! And because of your weakness, they were able to catch up with you! _

Ed stared in shock at the other. “What do you mean?” he began carefully before raising his voice once again, “That was the only place I had left! I had no choice!”

_ NO! _

The Riddler ran his hands through his hair and began to walk away from him again, the black bowler hat falling to the ground silently. As if it didn’t exist.  _ You had a choice! You  _ chose  _ to go back to him!  _ Venom dripped from the last word. As the reflection turned to look back towards the cot, Ed spotted pain in his eyes.  _ We were past this. We didn’t need him. _

Ed stared at him, the realization of what his stronger self was angry about slowly sinking in. “N-No,” he began again, eyes trailing to the ground as his chest became weighed down with the gravity of his guilt rushing at him at once. The Riddler saw this but said nothing, letting Ed continue, “I didn't go back for him.” He knew that, at this point, he was trying to convince himself as well as this tormented part of his psyche. Neither of them believed it. “I went back because it was the only place I could go. I had to-”

_ You didn't have to take the pill, let alone two. _

Ed flinched, feeling the truth travel up his spine like a shiver. He was right. Looking up at the Riddler, he was greeted with that same intense gaze he gave him earlier- a gaze that bored into him, trying to scoop the truth out of his chest.

_ Your thoughts are haunted by him. I know it. You know it. _

“Stop…” Ed’s voice came out like a whisper, losing his gaze as his eyes dropped to the floor once again, trying to turn his mind to other things.

_ You need him. _

Struggling once again against the restraints, Edward knew he needed to get out. It wasn’t about getting out of the situation anymore, it was about turning his thoughts and attention to something else- anything other than what the Riddler wanted him to admit to. The restraints were tight, metal chain wrapped around cotton straps, holding them firmly in place. If he could just get one of them free maybe he could-

_ You can’t shut me out! _

-MAYBE he could find a way out of this. Clenching his jaw in frustration, Ed began sliding his wrist around within the strap, testing to find weak spots and-

_ Edward! _

Instinctually slamming his wrist against the cot, Ed looked up finally to face the other, venom spewing from his voice, “Shut up! I’m trying to think!” The moment he locked eyes with the Riddler, however, his body seemed to stop. Like a deer in the headlights of an impending train. The gaze was so striking, so intense, he wasn’t sure he could ever look that way himself. Yet there he was, standing right above him. The only emotions Ed could even begin to pick out of that gaze were anger, betrayal, and, above all, disappointment. In that moment, he knew. He knew that, even without taking the pills, he would finally catch up with him. He knew Edward Nygma couldn’t hide anything from the Riddler. However, the projection didn’t say a word. He turned towards the door, back to the cot, and walked towards it. He was leaving. He was leaving him.

“You can’t leave me!” Ed shot at him, unable to fathom the utter betrayal he was facing from his own self, yet overshadowed by how desperate he felt in that moment of feeling complete loneliness as he watched  _ himself _ walk away from him, “What do you want me to say?! That I was wrong? That I need you to stay?” He took a couple more steps, picking up his bowler hat from the ground and dusting it off, ignoring the screaming host. Ed wouldn’t take it. “Fine! I know what you want. I admit it! I admit I’ve been lost without Oswald! I admit that I still need him! I admit that I never let go of him- that I still won’t!” The Riddler made it to the door before stopping. There was something else. Something else he wanted. Ed caught his breath, watching him carefully. That’s when he realized something- something the stronger part of him knew and embraced all along. The true reason he was upset; he knew it from the moment Ed stepped into his shoes and became him. His voice wavered, struggling against every other part of him that told him to stop. He couldn’t. He needed to say it.

“I admit that I lo-”

He couldn’t complete the sentence. Footsteps caught his attention. Before he could even begin to think about what was about to happen, Oswald walked through the doorway and cut right through the Riddler, causing him to dissipate around the shorter like a cloud of smoke. Ed let out a sigh of relief, a tired smile gracing his overall beaten down expression. “Thank goodness you’re here, Oswald. I was starting to think you wouldn’t show. Maybe it was just the second pill that brought him out, and you were just waiting for it to wear off enough. I’ve never been more relieved to see you.”

Oswald’s sharp icy blue gaze stared back on him, anger burning behind the growing look of utter confusion. Ed looked him over, letting out a grunt of surprise once he spotted the new coat and gun still stuck in his hand. He’d never seen that coat before, so why was he wearing it now? And where was the river water that always irritatingly plagued him?

“What are you talking about?” His voice was too clear; it didn’t echo at all. There wasn’t a hint of humor in his voice- which was strange, because this sounded like he was trying to be sarcastic with him. 

Ed let out an uncomfortable laugh. “You know what I’m talking about,” he began, eyes searching the other’s face, trying to find something that could pinpoint what was wrong, “I understand you may be upset about me taking more than one pill even after you told me not to- and I know you would have warned me about Tabitha if I was still asking for your help. You were right, I should have been more careful. You’ve made your point. Just help me out of here, and we can try again.”

Oswald just stared at him, completely unable to comprehend the utter madness that was spewing from Ed’s mouth. Ed stared back, searching for any sort give, anything he could hold on to. Was even his own hallucination turning against him?

After a moment of uncomfortable silence, Oswald took a deep breath before motioning his gun towards Ed. “Ed, what do you think is happening right now?” the tone in his voice was almost like a teacher walking a student through a problem with a simple solution.

Ed stared at him, the haze in his mind beginning to clear. He could feel the familiar aftereffects of the drug beginning to wear off- yet here he was. Still standing here. He began tentatively. “I took the drug again to see you... but my own mind was blocking me because I took more than one, but because it’s wearing off now, so you’re here again…?”

The only thing to move on the Penguin’s face was his brow furrowing in more confusion than before. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

The haze cleared. The smoke and mirrors disappeared. Edward could finally see him. Oswald. Standing there. In the same room. His eyes widened in fear. And surprise. And relief. But most of all, anger.

“Oswald… you’re alive?”


End file.
